I am sure we can all relate to times in our lives when we have felt overloaded. We know we have to act fast but we have so many competing claims on our time, all seeming equally important that we don’t know where to turn. Instead we simply freeze.

Two years ago my family and I moved home twice in a period of three months, settled children into new schools and set up all the administration/bureaucratic aspects of life in our new location, the normal expat/relocation tasks. Once all of these practical aspects had been arranged I turned to focus on my business and found I couldn’t. At that point I felt totally drained and very frustrated with my lack of energy and focus. Then it dawned, I had hit my overload point. What surprised me was that it hadn’t occurred at the physical point of moving or at what I would have naturally thought to be the most stressful moments, it came later and from left field and for that reason completely floored me.

Overwhelm can be experienced in an emotional, mental, physical way, or combination of all three. It can rear its ugly little head at any point. We can suddenly find ourselves in a depressed or distressed state. We can feel mentally locked, knowing we need to think clearly but not being able to see a clear path through, or we may experience physical symptoms such as insomnia, exhaustion, illness or cravings for comfort foods or alcohol.

As I talked to Leah seven weeks before she left Shanghai it became clear that she too was beginning to feel overwhelmed by the prospect of repatriation. Leah described herself as being at the center of a wheel surrounded by spikes that were all coming off in quick succession.

In the repatriation process there is so much to organize from a practical perspective, tying up all the aspects of life in one location, packing and shipping possessions and making arrangements for loved ones and pets. Those “to do” lists seem to self-multiply, one task so often leads to three more.

But it is not simply about tasks and getting things done, there is an emotional element to overwhelm and in repatriation this can be a toughie! As well as feeling sadness at leaving a life, friends and colleagues behind we may also have a sense of fear, anxiety, confusion or stress about what is going on or is about to happen in our lives.

• Fear that things will have changed back home so much that they can no longer fit.
• Stress about finding or fitting into new work role “back home”.
• Perhaps the biggest fear is anxiety about the actual decision: “are we making the right decision and how can we be sure?”

There can also be a lot of confusion about how we feel; excited and relieved to have made the decision one moment and sad for what we are leaving behind the next, alternately empowered by the decision in one moment and terrified by it a few hours later.

Another outcome of overwhelm is a lack of motivation to do anything. We know we have lots to do but find ourselves with little enthusiasm for those tasks, after all sorting and packing up our things can be a bit like a long trip down memory lane, happiness tinged with the sadness of goodbyes, or the sense that mistakes have been made, that life could have been different – if only….!

For some people, and Leah also talked about this, we may turn away from our normal healthy habits of self-care and even sabotage ourselves. Leah talked about her need to eat sugary and starchy foods when normally she is a healthy eater. She also found that she was reaching for more wine and beer than she normally would.

So at these points in the relocation process, how do we get ourselves back on a positive track?

Admit that you are feeling overwhelmed. When we feel overwhelmed we can feel that we are failing, not up to the task, disappointing. We are tempted to keep struggling on and on, trying to catch up, re-gain control.

STOP, reflect on how you are feeling and recognize the overwhelm.

Imagine how you would like to be feeling? Instead of reeling under the weight of your ‘to-do’ list ask yourself:

“ If I woke up tomorrow and everything was sorted what would it look and feel like?” Imagine how it would be to feel organized, in control, happy and calm?

FOCUS – The reality is that in a global life where change is frequent, focus is often lost in terms of personal life and careers. Life can feel as though it is spiraling out of control. It is important to have clear priorities. There are times when you just have to be let go of some things. Be honest about your capabilities given all that you have to do and select what can simply be “let go”.

Understand your Goals and Objectives for your Repatriation. Think about each area of your life that is important and be clear about what you hope to achieve in each area. Create a vision board of all the things you hope to do and achieve once you return to your home country.

Identify your personal values: what is important to you? How will repatriation help you to honour those values? Being able to answer this will mean that you can remind yourself why you have made the choice to go home.

Then focus on the HERE and NOW. What needs to be done? Make a list and prioritize. Then depending on the type of person you are and how you are feeling, either start with an easy task to build confidence OR get stuck right in with a toughy knowing that when it is completed you will feel A1.

However you feel, remember that you absolutely can do something about it. But better still, having read this article plan to avoid overwhelm in the future. Be clear about your reasons for repatriation, see the opportunity and the positive aspects of your relocation and plan and prepare well in advance. When you feel emotional at the thought of leaving, give yourself time and space to reflect and work through your feelings. And remember:

“The secret of getting ahead is getting started. The secret of getting started is breaking your complex overwhelming tasks into small manageable tasls, and then starting on the first one.”

Mark Twain.