What kind of decision maker are you? I ask that question because my husband and I are very different in the way we work things through in terms of ‘the big decisions’. I start at the emotional end of the spectrum and he at the rational. As you can imagine those first conversations are usually quite interesting to say the least! However ultimately we find some common ground and in fact I have been known to recite back to him his first rational arguments and vice versa.

Wherever we start from, we work through a process either structured or unstructured that takes us from first reactions – which may be as extreme as euphoria to horror through indecision, contemplation including much heart searching from my perspective, to discussion and debate and ultimately to a final decision. In retrospect I’d have expected the moment of the final decision to be a real ‘event’ – you know the type that should be accompanied by a drum roll and flashing lights, to be memorable – date, time, place -  but  it wasn’t like that, I think what occurred was a more creeping acceptance over a period of time that this was going to be the decision – it kind of evolved.

Much is written in expatriate literature about the decision making challenges organisations and employees face in terms of making the ‘right decision’ – employee, and the ‘correct selection decision’ – employer.

Badly considered and managed decisions as we all know can end in early returns with all the associated negative implications that this can entail. And for people relocating abroad on their own, the implications can be even more dramatic.

Often people talk about making the ‘right’ decision as though it is possible to tick boxes and then decide totally rationally – by perhaps counting the ticks. But what if it is not about being right or wrong but more about making the ‘best decision’ given all the factors and issues that have been taken into account.

Our move to Madeira nearly four years ago was an emotional and difficult one for me. I had a two and half year old daughter, who, for all of her life had lived in the UK near to cousins and grandparents whom she saw regularly and adored. However my husbands job meant she was missing out on him, he traveled a lot and long haul. Our life had some big pluses and big minuses.

Then a job opportunity in Madeira came along, my first reaction was  ‘you mean take our daughter away from the only environment she has ever known – never’, my second was  ‘and what will I do all day stuck on a rock in the middle of the Atlantic’. My first two ‘cons’ – big, negative and emotional!

Ever the coach I cooled down and over a period of probably a month we worked through our decision, we talked a lot, visited the island and finally made our decision based partly on logical deduction and partly on intuition. It felt good – the ‘best’ decision for us at that time. We moved and as with most relocations’ we had our ups and downs. But what we also had was a sound basis and understanding for ‘why’ we had made the move – we could remind each other of our reasons and reinforce the rationale for the move in tough times.

I conclude from this that we should all work with decisions from the premise of ‘confidence’. We are experienced decision makers after all. But we will all be helped by employing some form of structure to the decision making process. This forms the rational basis for the decision and in tough times the reminder of ‘why the decision was made’.

It also encourages us to take responsibility for our choice, it is much healthier to live with the belief that we are our own ‘agents’, that we have created our past and can create our future. It means as a downside we only have ourselves to blame but as an up-side we have ourselves to rely on to create the future that we want to live.

I am in Madeira because I chose to be here. Because I made the choice I have a responsibility to make it work. I have found accepting this makes me more proactive in making our life work, I don’t dwell on the negatives such as absence of family but focus on the great opportunities it provides for our family and those relatives when they visit and we visit them.

What have your ‘decision making’ experiences been in terms of relocation abroad?

How important a role did a structured decision making process play in your decision to relocate?

How do you feel the way in which you made your decision to relocate has impacted on your actual experience and life abroad?

Please – comment!

Until next time,

Happy decision making,

Louise